Wednesday, April 1, 2009

My daughter is getting obsessed about churches and God

This has been very irritating to me. I am a very spiritual person, but I do NOT believe that kids need to know all this at 7 years old.

I am a pagan, I left christianity like 3 years ago. I have a different picture in my head of God/Goddess or Gods are/is or whatever and however.....I dont mind churches, but I think that a person should be educated in ALL beliefs before accepting one.

So, my 7 year old daughter has been best friends with a church going girl and obviously she talks about that a lot to her. I think this is so because I have not heard my baby ask or say anything on this subject before this.

One day while driving in the car, she asked me:

- "Mom, I want to go to church"

I was like "Mia, do you know what church is?"

- "Yes, its a tall building where you sit and talk about God" (shock!!!!!)

- "Mia, we dont go to church"

- "Why not?"

- "Because mama doesnt believe in that, mama thinks that churches dont let people think" (I know, I know...I overdid it)

- "I will tell Kara what you just said"

- "If you do, her grandma wont let her play with you anymore"

Today she goes again about doing something and then she wanted to tell God about it. I'm like:

- "Do you know what God is?"

- "Yes, a man that lives up there", and she hows up in the sky

- "Who told you this?"

- "My teacher"

- "Oh, really?"

- ", myself....I just know"

Arrghhhhhh..............when I was that age (my parents and my whole family is russian orthodox) I never even knew what church is or what God is and all that!

I believe in personal freedom, but I still would not like my kid to go down the road of being christian (please my christian friends, dont be mad at me - its nothing personal). My pagan self doesnt let me interfere, its her choice. The mom in me protests....

What would you do? No, really? I am dumbfounded about how to go around this whole God issue.....she does have mythology books and we read them and she knows that there is a lot of Gods and Goddesses and she has been asking questions - I always try to envelop all that as in stories, not as the TRUTH, cuz to me there is no ONE truth....but as soon as she started hanging out with this girl.....its all about churches.


Auntie E said...

It is hard when your children start to become interested in something you do not agree with. My daughter wanted to be Baptized at the age of 7, just because a friend said she should be. We told her she had no idea what it meant,and she would have plenty time to learn. I learned to leave it alone. Let the child go with at her friend if she wishes. She will end up believing whatever she wants later in life. Just keep being honest in your feeling, when she ask questions. We all choose our own paths in life.Have a nice day.

Mea Culpa Bath and Body said...

Yeah....I am trying to just answer questions as best as I can. Kinda wanted to avoid the religion subject for few more years, but it happened.

I have no intention to stop her from being friends with this girl. She enjoys her and I will not cut that short only because of something like this.

I just hope its just something that will pass one time she was obsessed with angels and ghosts

Split Rock Ranch said...

Don't worry, she'll find her way in this world - let her explore. We did that with our daughter and she discovered that she knew in her heart what worked for her and it was amazing to watch her come to these discoveries in her own way in her own time. Enjoy the journey. Not that she didn't have plenty of church-going friends criticize us for not attending. We let her go and she came home appalled at some of the narrow-minded things that were said there!

Duni said...

I think your daughter must be curious as to what goes on there in that 'tall building'! As the two ladies before me wrote: let her experience it and figure out herself.
This town where I live is catholic, so I stick out like a sore thumb (I'm a free thinker). I get awkward questions from some of my young pupils too. I just try to be honest about how I feel, but leave them to make up their own mind.
Good Luck!

SHI said...

I'm experiencing something similar to this with my teenage son. I grew up with the freedom to go to different churches of all religions without having to worry about my parents judging me in any way (my dad was a minister and my mom a non practicing Catholic).

I am a pagan as well, and though my children have attended many churches with various friends and relatives throughout their childhood, they've never shown a lot of interest in christianity...until recently. My son now carries a bible with him (the old testament at that) and researches a bit on the internet.

I want my kids to have the freedom to choose their religious beliefs like I did. I also want to make sure that our lines of communication are completely open. I've explained to them my reasons for chosing the path that I have, and that the only thing that I ask is that when they choose theirs they will keep an open mind and not judge me for my beliefs.

I do struggle with him choosing a different path than myself...but I understand that he needs to find his own way.

It's hard sometimes...but just know that they are exactly where they're suppose to be. Hugs!

Mea Culpa Bath and Body said...

Thank you for all the support girls! I am just waiting for a day when all the judging people because of beliefs is going to stop.....aint that gonna be nice, huh?